While searching for my lost wristwatch, I may have found God

A friend of mine recently lost her wallet. She was pretty distraught over it and seemed to give up all hope over ever finding it again. Her cash, ID, credit cards, and insurance cards were all in it. I was about to loan her some cash when I paused, then asked her if she remembered all the places she was at before she lost it. She contacted the supermarket that she visited and sure enough, they had it. My friend can thank me due to a strong sense of faith that has developed throughout my life in ways that I wouldn’t have imagined.

It all started back when I was a teenager. During the summer of ’84 when I was just 17-years-old, I spent time at Manhattan Beach on a daily basis. One day, I left the beach and arrived back home two miles away. Checking my wrist, I realized that I had left my digital wristwatch at the beach. This watch was expensive and had an actual calculator on it which was the big technology at the time. I had taken it off when I went for a swim and forgot to put it back on my wrist when I left. Instead of giving up all hope that someone had found it and kept it for themselves, a strong dose of faith shot through my veins and told me to go look for it since there was a remote chance that the watch could still be sitting on the beach. I jumped on my bike and about 15-20 minutes later, I ran to the original location on the sand where my blanket was. Sitting there unnoticed by all the beachgoers was my watch!

In 1994, I got married. This time I was wearing a wedding ring. I was working a temp job at the New York Stock Exchange. One day before I left work to visit my friend in Uptown Manhattan, I removed my ring and placed it on the counter of the men’s bathroom to wash my hands after using the toilet. I rushed out and took the subway. As I sat in the subway car, I felt my hand and realized that my wedding ring was no longer on my finger. Again, the faith I had when I found my wristwatch 10 years earlier was still alive and well. I got off the train at the next station, ran to the other side, jumped on the downtown train, then arrived back at the New York Stock Exchange. Since I was only a temp worker, I had no company ID with me. The security guard gave me a hassle when I asked him to let me in. Instinctively, I held up my ring finger and showed him a ringless finger and shouted to him, “I left my wedding ring upstairs in the bathroom. My wife will divorce me if I lose it!”. Understanding my plight, the guard let me back in. Arriving at the same bathroom, that ring was still sitting there patiently waiting for me. You could thank my unfaltering faith for that!

During the Summer of 2019, I took the NYC Ferry to Lower Manhattan with some of my running friends. We got off and ran Uptown towards Central Park. I took the Ferry back on the Upper West Side back down to Lower Manhattan. Eventually, I made it back home hours later. While home, I realized that my Garmin 220 runner’s watch was not on my wrist. I remember taking it off at the Ferry and then I got distracted. Costing me over $200, I was not ready to declare this watch lost. Faith again made me brainstorm for where it could possibly be. In my mind, it could have been anywhere in New York City. I mentally backtracked the entire 10-mile route wondering where I could have dropped it. The only entity that could help me was the NYC Ferry Service since I did use the Ferry that day. I went to their website and clicked on the “Lost & Found” link. I filled out the online form, then patiently waited for a response. I knew my chances were extremely slim that they would have the watch. Hey, this is Manhattan after all where everyone looks out for themselves! A few hours later, I got a response stating that a tourist found my watch and gave it to a NYC Ferry worker. My faith came to the rescue yet again!

After 36 years of losing valuable things, then finding them again, my faith is now stronger than ever. Besides the events mentioned in this writing, there have been many other times throughout my life where faith has brought me to great achievements while getting me through difficult times. These experiences have brought me to one conclusion; that there IS a God. I have become more faithful not just in finding things, but in finding myself through a Higher Power. And it all started with a lost wristwatch.

A Tale of Two Running Clubs

I belong to two running clubs. One is conservative and one is liberal.

Being a person whose political beliefs are somewhere between moderate and liberal, you would think that I would favor one club over the other. The truth is that I love both clubs equally regardless of their political leanings. You see, running overcomes everything. It’s the common denominator that brings people together.

Running is a very innate human activity. Cavepeople have been doing this running thing since the dawn of man when they had to either run to catch their meals or run away from becoming a meal. Even though our intellects have evolved over time, there are still some primitive inclinations in all of us. Selfishness, bigotry, ignorance, and violence are all a part of the dark underbelly of the human condition. Running erases these tendencies. It also unites all of us regardless of our dissimilar moral, social, and political ideologies.

Whether you are a conservative, a liberal, or something in between, runners share the same values that never change. Camaraderie, goal-setting, fitness, motivational support, and teamwork are traits that runners of all ilks commonly exhibit.

In today’s divisive political climate, I am happy to be a part of an activity where politics doesn’t matter and being the best we can be as human beings does.

Matthew Rees of Swansea Harrier (2nd L) helping an ailing David Wyeth of Chorlton Runners (2nd R) down The Mall to finish the Virgin Money London Marathon. Rees stated that, “Helping him was more important than the race time”.

2019 – A Year In Review

One of the my biggest accomplishments for 2019 was an item that was patiently sitting on my bucket list for the past 30 years: publishing a book. It took me all these years of having life experiences and a strong desire to get it done to finally make it happen. I had finished writing the book at the end of 2018, then spent a few weeks in 2019 proofreading it. I finally published it on Amazon.com this past April. My high school friend Laurie Trovato was the first person who bought the book. Sales have continued since then. Besides purchasing it on Amazon, a signed and personalized copy can be purchased here for the same price.

Me with two of my youngest fans. I’m hoping they wait until adulthood to read my book since it mentions prostitution, torture, and murder.

In March, I nominated my friend Dionne Jordan Brown for the 2019 Woman of Distinction award. I met her at a race event in Coney Island three years ago. At the time, she was the assistant to a New York State Assemblyperson representing the Coney Island community. Dionne initiated the Coney Island Trekkers, a weekly walking group with the goal of helping members of her community lead healthier, more active lifestyles. Noticing her amazing positive attitude and proactive nature, I quickly befriended Dionne. This year, I nominated her for the Woman of Distinction award. An official ceremony was held by NYS Assemblymember William Colton where Dionne was given the award. In December, Dionne was selected to be President of the Southern Brooklyn Democrats Club.

From left: Nancy Tong, Dionne Jordan Brown, William Colton, and Ari Kagan.

Two months later, in recognizing my leadership skills, Dionne nominated me for the Man of Distinction award. This new award honors a male in the South Brooklyn community “Who in recognition of his excellent services provided to and within his community is selected as Distinguished Man of the Year”.

In April, I volunteered to help presidential candidate Tom Steyer support his Need to Impeach campaign. I had hand-written dozens of postcards and mailed them out to political leaders throughout the United States. President Trump ended up getting impeached by December.

These were all hand-written by me and mailed out to senators and congresspeople throughout the United States.

For the past several years, I’ve been keeping in touch with Joel Teret, my favorite high school teacher. He did a lot more than show me how to have a love for marine biology. You can read about all that he meant to me here. In May, I had the opportunity to spend the day with him at the New York State Marine Educators Conference. We got to attend various workshops, eat together, hang out, and talk about our lives. Meeting him was a big highlight this year. I haven’t seen him for 35 years since I graduated from Sheepshead Bay High School back in 1984.

Joel and I posing for a selfie during a meal break at the NYMSE Conference.

I’ve been running for 37 years. Throughout the years, I’ve run several marathons, but never an ultra-marathon. In May, I ran my first ultra, the Dirty German 50-Mile Trail Race. It took me over 12 hours to complete and it was difficult, but I persevered to cross the finish line. My story can be found here.

With Jacky Lee and other members of the Prospect Park Track Club moments before beginning my 50-mile journey.

The following month, I attempted to run the Great New York 100-Mile Exposition. By the time I reached the 37th mile, the pain throughout both of my legs was unbearable and I had to bow out. This was a very humbling experience for me. Even though I quit this race, I’m proud of the fact that I attempted such a huge challenge that most of my regular running friends would never even think of attempting. I would like to thank Jacky Lee, Ryan Knutsen, and Suchanh Chung for supporting me in this effort.

Saturday, June 22 – Here I am posing with friend and ultra-marathoner Wayne Pacconi. The race started at Times Square at 5:00am. I was very excited at the time, but little did I know that I would be quitting this event at Mile 37 in Astoria, Queens. Photo by Jacky Lee.

During 2019, I volunteered my time working with members of the Department of Sanitation in spreading the word about composting. During this experience, I learned that our food scraps account for over 20% of our trash and if not composted and left to rot, they will contribute greatly to Global Warming. Through the “Make Compost, Not Trash” program, food scraps are turned into rich compost and fuel that provides energy to homes throughout New York City. The DOS invested time and money in the Bay Ridge and Dyker Heights communities to help spread the word. Volunteers like myself assisted them with this endeavor.

At a “Make Compost, Not Trash” event in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn this past July.

Bill Welsh is a living legend from Staten Island, New York. He is a famous running coach who has trained hundreds of runners. One of them even reached the Olympics. Now that he’s 90-years-old, I wanted Bill to be interviewed by Will Sanchez, the host and creator of the show, Gotta Run With Will. Will denied my request and instead presented me with a challenge: to interview Bill myself. I took his challenge and in preparation for his interview, I had written 14 questions on index cards. Halfway through the interview, I ran out of questions. Fortunately, I was able to improvise the rest of the interview based on spending time with Bill during our two-hour car ride to the studio. Even though he needs the help of a walker to get around, at 90-years-old, Bill is still very witty and on the ball. I hope to be that way when I reach 90. Below is the YouTube video of our interview.

My interview with Bill Welsh from September 2019
At the Manhattan Neighborhood Network with Will Sanchez and Bill Welsh.

My daughter has been a college student since 2018. Since then, I’ve been helping to pay a large part of her college costs by working all kinds of interesting side gigs. One of them was portraying a dead body on the hit TV show Blue Bloods. You can read about my adventures doing all of these gigs here.

Emma with one of the many paintings she had to do for her college courses.

My son Hunter joined the cross-country track team representing his high school. He is doing well academically and seems to like running. I am happy that he is literally following in his father’s footsteps.

Just minutes away from crossing the finish line at a cross-country race at Van Cortlandt Park. Photo courtesy of Jason Paderon.

I don’t get much time to spend time with my family, but when I do, it’s usually during Thanksgiving. Below is a photo of my brother Aaron and sisters Sarah and Rachel. Sarah got married in September 2018 and Rachel works for LinkedIn.

At my Dad’s house for Thanksgiving with my siblings Aaron, Sarah, and Rachel.

My year wouldn’t be complete without being inspired by new friendships I’ve made throughout 2019. Each of the people below have made this year memorable for me.

John Curley is a private investigator, author, and an advocate for child protection. From spending time with him during author book signings, he has shown me that he cares deeply about the welfare of children. John has seen a lot of bad things in his life due to the nature of his profession. His great sense of humor in light of all the bad he has experienced amazes me.

John Young is a math teacher, marathon runner, and Ironman triathlete. John has achieved a lot more than most in life and his inspiring message to “be the hammer” has motivated me and others to take on difficult physical challenges. Being born with dwarfism, he has to work harder than others in completing marathons and Ironman races. John is a shining example of someone who has true grit willing to give 110%.

Phyllis Barone Ameduri is the great-great-granddaughter of Mary Anne Bascombe, a prominent member of Staten Island society during the late 19th Century. In writing her book about her, Phyllis did intensive research on this woman’s life. Her book, Never Ruled By Man, is an amazing account on the life of one of the earliest feminists. I had the privilege of reading and reviewing Phyllis’ book.

Agnes Varona Oquendo is a retired nurse, runner, and a 18-year breast cancer survivor. In 2018, she published “Running Against Cancer”, a memoir of the time she spent running across America to spread the message, ‘Early detection saves lives’. Since then, she has published two more books, “My Shorts”, and “Dark Whispers of a Serial Killer”. Since 2018, Agnes has inspired and helped me during the writing and publishing of my book.

Daniel Pollock and I had met at a diner in Coney Island this past April after running with mutual friends from the Ridge Runners running club. We became good friends since then. I admire him since he’s someone who keeps to his word and also values friendship, attributes that are hard to find in today’s world.

Diane Gattullo is the author of “This Life Of Ours: Fairy Tales of Mob Bartenders”, a story based on her many years as a bartender throughout the ’80s and ’90s. Diane arranged two large author events in 2019 that involved me and over a dozen other local authors. I sincerely thank her for her efforts.

Phil McCarthy is a renowned ultra-runner and race director for the Great New York 100-Mile Exposition. In 2019, I had the privilege of running with him on several occasions while preparing for this race myself. Holding a world-record in ultra-running, in 2018, Phil ran across America in 49 days, 7 hours, and 55 minutes. This is one of the fastest times ever across the United States on foot. Phil is an inspiring figure to many in the world of ultra-running. Being a novice ultra-runner, I was lucky to have spent time with Phil during our group runs together.

Jack Pessin is my distant cousin. I first met Jack back in 1995 at a cousin’s club event in New Jersey. Using the power of the internet, we were able to find eachother again 24 years later. My daughter and I had dinner with him and his family this year at their home. Jack is a successful acupuncturist, massage therapist, and herbalist. I have learned from our family tree that we both share the same great-grandfathers. I also learned that the similarities between our beliefs, thoughts, and mannerisms is uncanny; further proof that we are related.

I met Stephen Gilheeney at a New Year’s Eve party at his apartment at the very end of 2019. Upon meeting him, Stephen took an immediate liking to my son and treated him as if he were his own. Stephen is a pediatric oncologist by trade. From seeing how he treated my son, it is apparent that he cares deeply for all children.

Any Means Necessary

When my daughter entered college a year ago and had a partial scholarship that covered only 7% of her college costs, I was worried about how my family would pay for it in addition to her helping out financially. Being the hustler that I am, I took on all kinds of part-time gigs that came my way. I was willing to do anything and everything to make money for my daughter’s college as long as it was legal (ethical was a different story). In the words of Malcolm X, I was willing to make money “By any means necessary” to pay off her college. I even told my friends that I was willing to strip for my daughter. And every time I said that, they told me to please rephrase that comment. What started as a drive to make extra money turned out to be an exciting adventure where every opportunity was a journey into the unknown. The following are some gigs that I worked on this past year to help achieve that goal.

Dead Body

Apparent cause of death:
Being overworked from trying to pay off my daughter’s college expenses.

I was lucky to get hired to portray a cadaver in a medical examiner’s room in an episode of the crime drama Blue Bloods. Well, they did want experience and I was able to tell them that I once portrayed a dead body on an episode of Law & Order: SVU, which is true. I got paid to play dead and have my body studied by a sexy medical examiner in the scene. Contrary to what you may think, this job was not torture. You could read more about my ordeal here.

Giant Dancing Coffee Cup

Icy Joe may be cross-eyed and misguided, but he’s still lovable.

My friend Edwin Valero, an actor, dedicated dad, all-around great guy, and fellow hustler who always knows how to find work, referred me to the job of “Icy Joe”, a full-body costumed character designed to promote Dunkin’ Donuts iced coffee. Two 2.5-hour shifts were offered that day. I decided to take both shifts and spent five hours in Midtown Manhattan dancing and high-fiving various customers who stopped by to try new Dunkin’ Donuts products.

Waiting for the red light to change while leading my pace group during a Summer Streets event.

Professional Pacer

I was hired to be a professional pacer by John Henwood for the Mile High Running Club. After 37 years of running, I finally have the opportunity to make money at it. Besides, I love helping others achieve their running goals with this new position.

Author

The author with one of his fans and long-time friend Jaime.

I published a book called Eight Hours in Freeport. Any proceeds I have made through Amazon, book signings or from here, I have deposited into my daughter’s college account.

Web Editor

From a post on Facebook by celebrity photographer Barry Morgenstein, I was able to get a part-time gig as a web editor for his website www.barrymorgenstein.com. The previous web editor was charging him way too much for the work involved and I was able to offer an hourly rate that was 67% less than what he was being charged. In order to get this gig, I mentioned my experience as the web editor for the Staten Island Athletic Club’s website (statenislandac.org).

Male Stripper

I was never a male stripper, but I would have taken up the offer if the opportunity had arisen. Yes, I love my daughter THAT much. And it’s not what you think. Get your mind out of the gutter!

Beautiful Pain

Inspired by my friend Jeanine who was going through trauma in her life at the time, I had written a poem several months ago and titled it “Beautiful Pain”. I eventually posted it to Facebook. Soon after posting it, my friend Stephen Niese, a male model, actor, and photographer, shared a captivating photo with me that he had taken of a butterfly resting on Coney Island Beach. I put our creations together and the poster below is the result.

What the poem means to me is that we cannot fully appreciate something without knowing the full story of it’s existence.

The 50-Mile Mountain

May 12, 2019 – The Next Day

As I drove home from Philadelphia on a rainy Sunday afternoon, I could not help but be reminded of the weekend I just had as my car radio blasted The Eye of the Tiger.  While the song played, the memories of the feat that I had accomplished the night before had resurfaced and made me forget momentarily about my unbelieveably tired and achy body.

Just like any Rocky movie where the Italian Stallion goes through a kick-ass training regimen that eventually leads to the Big Fight, the song reminded me of the many months that I had to endure during my training to attempt my first ultramarathon. Training that required me and my ultra-running comrades from the Prospect Park Track Club to run in single-digit temperatures in the middle of Winter, snow,  ice, pouring rain, and with constant tiredness that frequently affected our personal lives.  For me, the added challenge was training alone 98% of the time.  I had to develop the mental fortitude and focus to help get me through it all.

Last December, Coach Matt put together an Ultrarunners Training Group.  Training started on New Year’s Day and continued until the day before the big event.  While Mickey was Rocky Balboa’s coach, Matt was ours.  Rocky trained for the Big Fight.  Our Big Fight was the Dirty German 50-Mile Trail Race.

May 11, 2019 – Race Day

My memories of race day shot straight to the moment I lined up at the start.  There was a lot of electricity and excitement in the air coming from the other runners.  I, however, wasn’t feeling it.  A lot of self-doubt clouded my mind.  I wondered how the hell could I accomplish something like this.  Since I had never attempted an ultra-marathon before, especially one of this length, I didn’t believe that I could actually pull it off.  However, Adam, our club’s biggest cheerleader, told me right before the race in no uncertain terms that I would get the job done.  When I had no faith in myself, Adam’s words settled into my subconscious and morphed into a mantra that would help carry me through the race.

Since a 50-mile trail race was way off the radar for even a 36-year seasoned runner like myself, I decided to treat this event as a challenge the same way a mountain climber would attempt to climb a mountain.  In my mind, there were three parts to this “race”, the uphill, the summit, and the downhill.  If I can mentally focus on this race one section at a time, I would be able to complete it.  This 50-mile course had the perfect format to apply my mountain-climbing analogy to.  It was comprised of three 16.67-mile loops.  With this setup, I could break the race into thirds to make goal-setting more achievable and completion a possibility.

Somewhere along the first loop, I came across a seasoned ultrarunner from Germany named Peter.  We quickly befriended each other.  I liked his slow-moving pace and his claim-to-fame that he often comes in last in many of his ultra races.  I was so terrified of not finishing that his presence reassured me.  As we got to know each other, we created simple rules to help us get through the course.  When we approached an uphill, we would both walk it.  When we picked up the pace too quickly, we would intentionally slow each other down.  During our time together, we discussed everything from my curiosity about a German’s point view of President Trump, the sordid history of the United States, our children’s accomplishments, and beer.  Peter helped carry me through a good 18-20 miles of the race.  While he helped me, I reflected on the time I ironically helped another German runner achieve pr glory during the 2014 NYC Marathon when I was a NYRR pacer.  You can read about that here.

Peter and I both completed the first loop together.  Several miles later, his consistent pace was too much for me and I eventually pulled back from him.  I was alone again, but still stayed the course.  By Mile 25, my road shoes were full of all kinds of small pebbles, mud, and water.  At that point, I seriously looked forward to completing my second loop where I could make a pit stop at my team’s tent to change into a fresh pair of trail shoes and socks that were in my drop-bag.  Eventually, I was able to do that as I completed my second loop, which was now at the 33-mile mark with 16+ miles to go.

As I continued the race and as the miles wore on, my spirit and body quickly degraded.  My pace slowed down.  I became listless and a feeling of hopelessness began to settle in.  Add to that the painful feeling of plantar fasciitis began to flare up in both my feet, I was falling apart both physically and mentally.  Then at the 38-mile mark, something amazing happened:  I experienced a Terminator Moment.  In the original Terminator film, the Terminator is killed towards the end of the movie.  Just when everyone thinks he is dead, a backup battery turns on inside of him to reignite him into action yet again to continue his rampage.  That was me at mile 38.  I had this renewed vigor with the resolution that I WILL now finish this race and nothing was going to stop me.

As I continued past the 40-mile mark, I played a new mental game with myself to carry me through the final 10 miles: the single digit countdown.  Nine miles became eight miles, then seven miles, etc.  With every mile that was clicked off my belt, my excitement level doubled.  With every terrain challenge I conquered such as the hills, river and mud crossings, I would wave au revoir to each of them knowing that that was the final time that I would have to deal with them.

With less than a mile left, I began hearing the loud music that was playing throughout the event at the race start area.  Literally and figuratively, this was music to my ears.  I was stuck behind another runner in a single track section.  She sensed my sudden burst of energy and moved over to let me pass her.  I was now in Terminator Mode after all.  Once she let me pass her, it was like a drain that had become unclogged.  I blew through what was left of the course hellbent on reaching that finish line once and for all.

As I exited the tree-covered trails and entered the final 100-yard stretch of  an open field towards the finish line, I felt more like a conquerer than just a survivor.  Only seconds away from the finish line, I was greeted by wild roaring cheers from all my trail-running friends from the Prospect Park Track Club.  I felt a great feeling of triumph at that moment.  This was in great contrast to the self-doubt that I had felt moments before the race started.  Crossing the finish line and receiving a well-earned finisher’s medal around my neck confirmed the reality of what I had just done.

After completing the race with a time of 12:04:00 (14:28 per mile pace), I had found out later that 25% of all participants did not finish the race distance.  It was nice to be one of the finishers.  It also validated all of the many months that I had trained for this event.

May 18 – Seven Days Later

As I needed a week to fully recover from this race to become my abnormal self again, I now have time reflect on what I had done.  I went through a roller-coaster of emotions throughout this event from self-doubt to absolute despair to total euphoria.  While the extreme tiredness and physical imbalance I experienced within the week after this race will disappear, the wonderful memories of it will always remain.

I am forever grateful for the support I received from all the members of the Prospect Park Track Club who were at the event.  They believed in me and  were my cheerleaders.  I would like to congratulate every single one of them who ran their own 25k, 50k, and 50-mile races that day and who persevered in spite of their own unique hardships and challenges.

In 1982, I became a runner.

In 1995, I became a marathoner.

In 2019, I became an ultrarunner!

DG Race Pic

Me within minutes of crossing the finish line.  30 minutes after this photo was taken, it became totally dark outside.  I put my headlamp on after completing the second loop just in case.

Abra-Cadaver

As a background actor, I’ve been trying to get work on the CBS show Blue Bloods for many years now.  The show stars Tom Selleck and Donnie Wahlberg as members of a family of cops living a cop’s life in New York City.  After submitting for roles on that show for the past several years to no avail, I finally got my big break portraying a cadaver in a medical examiner’s room.  But this was not an ordinary dead guy casting call: they wanted experience.  Oh boy, did I have experience playing dead!  Several years ago, I played the featured dead body on an episode of Law & Order: SVU.  You can read all about it here.  When the casting agent from Central Casting called me, he told me that a lot of other actors they hired in the past didn’t know how to play dead people well.  I explained to him how effectively I played a dead guy before and he was impressed with my mad death skilz.  I was hired!

Dead Body Experience

The required wardrobe I needed to bring for this role was a bathrobe and a pair of warm-up pants.  This was in preparation for playing a cadaver who was pretty much lying naked on top of a medical examiner’s table.  Another actress and I were both to play dead and we were brought outside the studio to an awaiting makeup truck.  The truck was a large 18-wheeler, but designed inside with a fully-functional makeup room.  It took about an hour for the makeup people to apply the “Cadaver Grey” and “Dead Flesh” colors (you won’t find those in a box of Crayolas) to the upper half of my body as well as to my legs and feet.  I wasn’t going to be completely naked in the scene; this was network TV after all.  My nether-region would be covered with a sheet because dead people on these shows are never completely naked.  Underneath, I was actually wearing my warm-up pants.  The transformation from living to dead was unsettling even to me, especially once I closed my eyes to take a dead guy selfie before I was escorted off to set.

Once on set, I hopped up on the stainless steel medical examiner’s table and was told by a crew member to lie down while they adjusted various items that would support my comfort during the scene.  They expected me to be lying half-naked on that table for the next few hours, so my comfort was their top priority.

After lying down for awhile, a very pretty-looking actress who was to portray the chief medical examiner approached me.  We shook eachother’s hands to introduce ourselves and then engaged in some small talk.  Another beautiful woman came by and stood next to her.  That woman was a real medical examiner.  Her job was to show the actress how to make the role look real.  One of the actions was for the actress was to lift up my limp arm, study it, then drop it back down.  During rehearsal, she man-handled it like it was a piece of dead meat.  The real M.E. showed her how to study it more thoughtfully and with more care.  Lying there with two hot women playing with my right arm is a memory that I will always keep.

Once all the actors were in their first positions, rehearsal of the scene began.  Actor Steve Shirripa of Sopranos fame portrays a police officer coming into the medical examiner’s room with his partner.  They’re discussing a woman’s death.  As they are approaching the M.E. to talk to her about it, she’s in the middle of examining a cadaver and that would be me.  In the scene, my body is awkwardly turned on it’s side while the M.E. is  examining my back.  After she says a few lines to the other actors who approach her, she topples my lifeless body back onto the table with a thud.  Being the consummate actor that I am, I just let gravity take it’s course and let it fall onto the table.  She then picks up my right arm, carefully examines it, gets irritated due to the topic of the conversation, then drops it down onto the table.

steve-schirripa-bridget-moynihan-blue-bloods-cbs

Actors Steve Shirripa and Bridget Moynahan.

During the entire scene which lasted for about three to four minutes, I had several challenges to contend with.  One was not moving, breathing, or even letting my chest move up and down.  As you can imagine, playing a dead person is not an easy thing to do.  As the camera began rolling during each take, I inhaled a bunch of breaths and then held my breath during the entirety of the scene.  Once the camera moved away from me did I catch my breath again.  Another challenge was to let the actress treat my body like a limp piece of dead meat.  I had to let my body flop down with a thud after she examined my back, then let my right arm flop down as well.  Running hard for seven miles a few hours before this gig helped to put me in a physically tired state which made my deadness look more believable.

In between takes, the site of me looking dead to the cast and crew was the butt of many jokes.  One of the crew members shouted out, “Is he really dead?!”.   Even Steve Shirripa made a comment about me.  From his angle, he saw the M.E. with her hands behind my back, but couldn’t see exactly what she was doing with those hands.  He said, “It really looks like she’s giving him a proctology exam”.  I cracked up which made everyone else crack up seeing the dead guy in stitches.

I worked this gig for about four hours.  When the scene was over, the crew began to break everything down to call it a day.  A toe tag was removed from my big toe.  I kept it as a souvenir.  According to the tag, my name was Tony Hernandez.  Sounds about right.

Screen Shot 2019-02-23 at 12.00.19 AM

The money I made from this cadaver role will help to pay for my daughter’s college tuition.  I hope that she knows how much her daddy has to kill himself for her education.

Post Script

A few months later, the episode aired on national TV and my scene came on as shown in the screenshots below.  I never had so much fun or made so much money laying down on the job.

2018 – A Year In Review

The worst thing that happened to me in 2018 was that I was fired from two part-time jobs.  One was as a running coach for the New York Road Runners Club, the other was as a deliveryperson for the app-based delivery service called Postmates.  After working only two days for the NYRR, I’m still not sure why I was fired.  An explanation for why Postmates fired me can be explained here.  These were the only two negatives in what ended up being a very productive year for me.  And what especially made the year stand out for me was  that I spent more time helping others besides myself.

In February, I met with William Colton, the local Assemblyperson who represents my neighborhood.  We were discussing ways we can improve our neighborhood.  At the end of our meeting, he handed me nomination forms for the “Women of Distinction Award”.  He asked me if I knew any women who deserved recognition for their efforts to improve their community, I should nominate them using the forms.  This award “honors women whose outstanding contributions help make our community stronger”.  I nominated two friends I know who have worked tirelessly to support disabled runners.  As a result of my nomination, Nicoletta Narangis and Jacky Lee were both recognized at a formal ceremony.  Both received framed certificates and each gave speeches at the ceremony.  Afterwards, I had lunch with everyone including Mr. Colton and the mother of slain police officer WenJian Liu .

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Nicoletta giving her speech upon receipt of her award.

 

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Jacky posing with her award.

My son Hunter was previously was a member of a scout troop that was ethnically diverse.  This year, he joined a new scout troop that was entirely Asian.  This did not bother him in the least and he made many new friends there.  He completed his first year with them in June.

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Emma had turned 18-years-old in May.  Since she officially became a woman, I wanted to film a music video that celebrated this fact while showing the conflicting feelings that I  had as her father.  We filmed scenes to the video in about a dozen different locations throughout Brooklyn and Manhattan.  You can view the video here

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Scene from the music video, The Edge of Eighteen.

Both of my children graduated in June.  Emma graduated from high school and Hunter graduated from junior high school.  In September, Hunter started high school while Emma started college.  I am excited that they are both becoming more independent people.

A friend of my cousin David had told him that he needed to hire a bunch of seat-fillers for a live music show that his son was going to produce in Queens.  Knowing that I was once a seat-filler years ago at an Andre Rieu concert, my cousin referred him to me thinking that I could help him in some way.  I told him that I can probably get a bunch of my actor friends to fill seats for his show if he paid them.  He liked the idea.  I then proceeded to find a bunch of friends who were a combination of actors, runners, and co-workers.  I found about 18 people in all.  They were each paid $40 to fill seats at a 2-hour show.  One of the singers in the show was really good and was in fact an American Idol finalist.  I was pleasantly surprised to see that my efforts in getting this venture together were a smashing success.

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My friends and I posing together after seeing the show.

In August, I filmed a horror short called The Lovely Woods.  I submitted it into the 2018 Single-Take Film Challenge.  Out of 30+ submissions, my short was chosen as a semi-finalist.

 

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The crew of friends who helped me make this film short a reality.

38641244_10156557316774785_5096448935493369856_nI originally had the ending credits of the film  displayed with no music.  Previously, my daughter introduced me to the music of Harley Poe.  One of his songs really excited me and I knew that the song would pair well with the ending credits.  But I needed Harley Poe’s permission to use the song.  I emailed him and within a matter of days, he responded and gave me permission to use it.   It was very rare to get this kind of permission, especially for someone like me who is an unknown filmmaker.  You can view the film short complete with Harley Poe’s song here.  I’d like to thank the following for helping me make this film happen: Anthony, Giovanni, Yolande, Emma, Andriana, Jacky, Michael, and Anthony Martinez.

 

In August, my family and I went on a 1,200-mile journey through Canada.  We visited the Canadian side of Niagara Falls, Toronto, the Thousand Islands, Montreal, Lake George, and Albany.  I’d like to thank my running friend Sarah Gariepy.  She is a fellow pacer for the NYRR who lives in Montreal.  She had brought me and my family on a nice tour when we visited that city.

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Hunter and Emma on the Canadian side with the Horseshoe Falls behind them.

Will Sanchez is a running friend of mine who retired early due to making good decisions about his career.  He’s a life-long runner who embraces everything about the local running community in New York City.  He is a very soft-spoken and thoughtful guy who has created a running-themed TV series for public access television called Gotta Run With Will.  Two years ago I was interviewed for one of his shows.  Since then, I have been actively involved in finding new “talent” for Will to interview.  If I think the person has a great story, I will refer him/her to Will for a future show.  This year, I am proud to have recommended two runners.  One was John Pierre.  Many years ago, John was assaulted by a gang of thugs.  He was beaten so badly that he was left for dead.  Suffering from the damaging and painful effects of traumatic brain injury, John overcame his pain by resorting to running as his therapy.  Many marathons and half marathons later, John has become a kind of super-hero who is now known as The Ultimate Running Machine.  Realizing that he survived his ordeal, he wants to show people the power of overcoming hardships through his continued participation in race events.  He now runs every race donning a custom-made cape to add to his super-hero persona.  You can view his interview here.

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Another runner I recommended was Wayne Pacconi.  I met Wayne while a pacer at New York Road Runners Club race events.  As I got to know Wayne’s interesting life through social media, I noticed that he had a very lighthearted approach to running.  Many of Wills episodes are about more serious topics.  Wayne was a breath of fresh air and his episode was rather entertaining.  Wayne is a race director who puts on various trail race events in New Jersey.  And he owns chickens too!  You can view his episode here.

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In October, I had the opportunity to support two friends who were running for office in their respective communities.  Andrew Gounardes ran against Marty Golden for the 22nd Senatorial District of Brooklyn.  Golden was the incumbent who served his district for over 16 years.  Gounardes was a relative newcomer who had to campaign hard to win the district.  The two candidates battled it out.  In the end, Gounardes won the seat by about 1,000 votes.  During his campaign, I ran with an “Andrew Gounardes for New York State Senate” campaign poster attached to my pacer stick.  I managed to run a total of 20 miles this way over a three-day period and exposed his message to potentially thousands of people during my runs.  I am very excited to see how Andrew will do his job.  He has a lot of great ideas on how to improve his district and has the energy to see them through.

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On the Staten Island side, I actively supported my friend Michael DeVito for Congress.  Michael also campaigned hard, but in the end, Max Rose was the Democrat who won with more votes.  Michael is a very upstanding human being who radiates heaping doses of positivity whereever he goes.  I had the pleasure of having pizza with him and his wife Natalie while they were campaigning in Staten Island.  Through my desire to help Michael, I got to know both of them better.  I also brought (aka dragged) my son Hunter with me so he can learn more about the political process.

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In the acting world, I got hired to be a badminton advisor for a series based on the life of Emily Dickinson.  This was one of the most surprising “acting” gigs I was ever hired for.  You can read why here.

Also, in one of the several acting gigs I worked on in 2018, I portrayed a small-town sheriff for the show Instinct.

 

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Me patiently waiting for my required donut break.

 

My sister Sarah had gotten married in September to a great guy named Piotr.  I was in tears when she walked the aisle because I took care of her since she was a baby.  Now she’s a married woman.  I wish them the best of luck.

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My dad walking his daughter down the aisle.

Life works in funny ways.  Right after I got fired from my coaching gig with the New York Road Runners Club after working for them for only two days, I soon got hired to be a professional pacer for the Mile High Running Club.  My job was to pace and lead a group of runners that were training for the NYC Marathon.  This gig lasted for several weeks up until the actual Marathon.  I did a well enough job that they will be hiring me again this January to pace runners for the 2019 NYC Half Marathon in March.

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In December, I orchestrated a trail run in the Staten Island Greenbelt.  My efforts involved 22 runners from three different running clubs.  Most of the runners came from Brooklyn and had never run in the trails before.  Everyone enjoyed the 5.5-mile run.  I even connected a group of injured runners and had them walk with a very pregnant runner through the woods.

 

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Finally, I spent many long Sundays at a cafe througout 2018 writing a book.  I finished it as a 75-page novella and I am now in the proofreading stages.  Writing something significant was on my bucket list for the past 30 years and I finally achieved it.

Failure is Sometimes an Option

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In the movie Apollo 13, flight director Gene Kranz warned that, “Failure is not an option” when NASA scientists back on Earth were trying to figure out how to bring the astronauts back home safely.  In many areas of society, the truth is that failure is an acceptable part of the pathway towards success.   The relationship between failure and success varies greatly depending on what one is engaged in.

Two months ago, I worked part-time as an independent contractor for Postmates.com, a delivery service that uses a cell phone app to send couriers to make local deliveries around their neighborhood.  After a few days of making deliveries in my spare time, I began to enjoy working the business.  I made good money and I liked that I was in control of when I wanted to work.  Two weeks afterward, I was shocked to find out that my delivery account was terminated.  In essence, I got “fired”.  I found out with each delivery I made, every customer received an email asking them to rate the quality of my service.  My overall rating after two weeks was a 4.2 out of 5.0; this was below the 4.7 threshold for me to continue working for them.

I was very upset and wondered what I had done wrong for most of my customers appeared to be very happy with my service.  I then realized that the Postmates corporation had a very high standard for those who worked for them.  Due to their high standard, in my eyes, I had “failed” as an independent contractor for them.  This made me think about the different ways that failure is viewed by society and how standards for failure vary greatly depending on what you’re involved with.

For Postmates, failure happened to those who scored below a 4.7 out of 5.0.  If I translated that to a percentage, a 4.7 would be 94%, 4.6 would be 92%.  In the Postmates world, a 92% or below is considered a failure.  In almost every school across the United States, a passing grade is a 65%.  For students, they can fail one-third of the time, yet still pass their overall grades.

A professional baseball player can fail 70% of the time when getting struck out at the plate and can still be considered having a successful season with a .300 average.

If an automobile salesman sells one car out of every 20 people he shows it to, he would have failed 95% of the time.  The 5% that he actually sells a car to would make him/her a success in the auto sales industry.  That salesman is well aware that if he wants to sell five cars, he will have to show them to 100 customers.

One of the greatest examples of a “failure” is with inventor Thomas Edison.  He experimented with over 10,000 light bulb designs that all failed before he finally designed the one that worked.  If you want to put that in percentage terms, Edison failed 99.99% of the time.  In his situation, he kept on failing until he succeeded.  His persistence and ability to accept failure at a high rate made him one of the most successful inventors of the 20th Century.

I am looking forward to failing as much as possible because I know that the more failures I go through, the more successes I will achieve.  Knowing what I know now, failure is a rather attractive option.